Children of Light

Authored by Matthew Rogers

Psalm 119:9 How can a young man keep his way pure?
By keeping it according to Your Word.

In a world of increasing impurity with porn exposure rates hovering around 90% among male teens, curse words becoming a part of normal talk, and having a dirty mind is treasured, how can a young man stay pure? Psalm 119:9 shows us that in order to walk in purity, we must align ourselves with God’s commandments. When God’s commands are not obeyed, we see it take place in three areas, first in thoughts, which lead to words, and ultimately resulting in actions. Therefore, to find out how to remain pure, we must look at what God has to say about purity of the mind, purity of the tongue, and lastly, purity in our actions. 

Sin always starts in the mind, or heart as the Bible refers to it, whether it be meditated sin, something we see and then dwell on for too long, or even just a simple fleeting thought that we grab onto until it leads us down a wrong path. Since our minds are where sin usually starts, a pure mind is essential to have a healthy relationship with God. Before we can discuss how to keep a pure mind before God, we must take a look at how God describes the mind in His word. Jeremiah 17:9 states “The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it?” The Hebrew word for heart here is “leb” which ties the intellect, emotions, and the will together as opposed to the modern view of the mind just being intellect. If our hearts are this filled with evil it may seem impossible to keep them pure especially in a world that pushes impurity at every turn. However God provides a way for us to do just that; in Romans 12:2 it says “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect”. This verse says that instead of letting the world shape us, we must be transformed, in other words, become something new. The moment we become believers we are a new creation as seen in 2 Corinthians 5:17, so the transformation is already there. The renewal of the mind on the other hand is not an immediate thing but a process of aligning our minds with the new creation that we are. Just as when one falls into mud, they do not immediately take off the dirty clothes to put on new clothes but rather they wash themselves off first so that when they put the new clothes on they do not become dirty. This is what renewing the mind is all about. We have taken off the old clothes and have been given fresh clean garments, but in order to keep them clean we must clean out our minds first.

Now that we have established that the mind is innately wicked and that the process of renewing it is essential for our transformation from the old creation to the new, we must learn what steps we must take to renew our minds. Paul gives us a good outline on how to renew our minds in Philippians 4:8 which says “Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.” Instead of letting the things of this world infect our thoughts, Paul gives us a pure list of things to dwell on instead. The first thing he mentions is “whatever is true”; as young men, we are quick to make scenarios filled with lust, riches, and putting ourselves above others that are completely filled with lies. The way women talk and act in our thoughts when controlled by lust is completely false. Our thinking about how a conversation with one’s boss would go is far from the truth. Even the constant degrading of others to lift ourselves up in our own minds is based upon lies we tell ourselves. If instead we filled our minds with truth and those scenarios were based in reality, it would be much harder to direct them towards sin. The list goes on to include not just that which is true but that which is honorable and right. This gives the idea that our thoughts should firstly, honor God and align with what He says is right and secondly, should honor the people or things that we think about. A good way of putting it is “if I had my thoughts in a video to show this person would they feel honored or disgusted and embarrassed with the way I treat them in my mind.” The last 5 traits that Paul mentions in this verse paint the picture of a clean room, lovely to look at with everything in order, not cluttered and filled with trash. When we spend hours a day scrolling on TikTok, Instagram, and other social media sites we fill what is supposed to be a clean, pure room with conflicting opinions, fake or staged videos, lies, or even just straight up useless things. When our minds are filled with these things instead of that which is pure, excellent and lovely it begins to form our behavior. As Luke 6:45 says  “The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.” If we change what is stored in our minds, our speech and actions will flow out of that, but if we leave the filth in or continue adding to it then that is what will flow out of our mouths. 

Just like the mind controls what comes out of the mouth, so also the mouth controls the actions of the body. James 3:3-4 compares the tongue to the bit in a horse’s mouth that the rider uses to control the horse and as the small rudder of a massive ship allowing the ship to turn whichever way the pilot desires. He goes on to say in verse 5 that “the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things” and in verse 6 he states “[the tongue] sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell.” Though it often seems that what we say is not as important as what we think or do to others, the very words that come out of our mouths are the most damaging to our relationship with others and more importantly, with God. Matthew 12:36-37 says “But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” The important word to note here is “careless.” Christians can easily fall into the sin of justifying their speech by saying “as long as I don’t cuss I’m good” or “as long as I replace the F-word with frick and say gosh instead of God then I’m fine.” The problem with this is that the phrase “careless word” gives the idea not of just cussing or vulgar language but any sort of speaking without thinking. This includes but is not limited to: insults, comebacks, gossiping, snide comments, muttering under our breath, boasting, talking behind others backs, and the list goes on. The point is that we as Christians need to learn how to keep our mouths closed, not just how to replace some words with other “less bad” ones. James 1:19b states “But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.” It is very easy to switch this around and be slow to listen and quick to speak which results in us getting angry quicker; but God calls us to be holy, set apart, different from the world. One of the biggest testimonies a Christian can have is a controlled tongue. When we are given an opportunity to belittle someone to make ourselves look better and don’t it draws the attention of those around us. Also, when we listen first and give our thoughts only when needed instead of having to add our two cents all the time, others will respect us and our opinions more giving an opportunity to share Christ more. 

Now this is not to ignore or downplay the importance of keeping curse words and vulgar language far from us. God has much to say on this topic as well. Ephesians 4:29 might come to mind for a lot of us, “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear” or Ephesians 5:3-4, “But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.” Here God clearly shows that unwholesome talk must not come out of our mouth and shouldn’t even be named among us. The reason for this is that the outward speech is showing the inward reality. Even when we use replacement words to curse we are still expressing the sinful thoughts and frustrations through our speech. This highlights the importance of controlling our speech. Very much like what we see influences what we think, what we hear directly affects what we then speak. The more friends we hang out with that use vulgar language or coarse jesting, the more songs we listen to with cuss words every sentence, and even the shows we watch start to shape our pattern of speech. I didn’t even know the F-word until 6th grade when I heard it for the first time. Throughout high school I heard it more, started to get into social media where it was used occasionally until one day I got so frustrated at a video game that I said it and all my friends went dead silent because I was the one that never cussed. Right then I realized that I had let myself be shaped by the language of others and had conformed to the pattern of this world like Romans 12:2 warns against. This is just one example of how what we let in shapes what comes out. With that in mind we need to be aware of the areas in our life that are influencing our speech and confront or cut them out whether it be friends, social media, or the shows we watch. 

Now that we talked about what not to let out of our mouths, we need to see what God says ought to flow from us. The last part of Ephesians 4:29 gives us insight into this topic “but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.” Other translations say “building up” giving us the idea that our speech needs to build up not tear down like the common language of our day. The perfect comeback or the well crafted insult are very things this verse is fighting against. Instead we need to encourage others and be gracious to them showing our love through our words. Colossians 4:6 says “Let your speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person.” Proverbs 16:24 furthers this idea by saying “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” These verses show us just how good gracious words can be to those who hear. Not only are they sweet and healing for those that they are directed towards but they also help us know how to respond to others. Sometimes we find it difficult knowing what to say to help someone, but this could just be because we don’t have a pattern of gracious speech. If we keep our speech pleasant consistently, we will find that what we have to offer others comes from God’s Word because that is what our speech revolves around. One of the hardest things we may have to do as Christians is change our pattern of speech, but if we make a hard effort towards it we will find it changing more areas of our lives than just our speech. 

One major area that controlling our tongue affects is the way we act. People make judgements and first impressions, whether right or wrong, based on the actions of others. There is even a saying for this, “actions speak louder than words.” The reason for this is that our thoughts and our speech are reflected in our actions, making them the biggest source of influence we have. Our actions can be the very thing that draws someone to the Lord or can be the very reason someone wants nothing to do with God. Jesus commands in Matthew 5:14-16, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.” There are two important points to note here in this passage. First of all, we do good works as a result of our salvation. Since we have put on the new and taken off the old, these good works will spring forth. It never mentions that by doing these good works we obtain salvation, but instead, brings us to the second important point; others can be saved by our good works. As we live out God’s commands in purity, others see the change in us and start to feel the emptiness they have without Him. This leads to a righteous desire to obtain the same gift our actions are pointing to. Peter Scholtes hymn based off of John 13:35 says “And they’ll know we are Christians by our love, by our love / Yeah, they’ll know we are Christians by our love.” This captures the idea beautifully showing that the way we treat one another as brothers and sisters in Christ should bring anyone observing to the conclusion that we are followers of Him. If we are not making every effort to keep our actions pure while living for Christ, think of just how much damage we could do to those who observe. Take Ravi Zacharias for example, he was an amazing apologist, had many great sermons, and founded the Ravi Zacharias International Ministries. However, after he died, multiple sexual sins were brought to life which severely damaged RZIM’s reputation as well as the trust of many who had followed his teachings throughout the years. Sadly, there are many more examples of this that we can see in today’s age. Though we do not all have churches of our own or a group that we lead, we are still responsible for the circle of influence that we do have. Paul sums up this responsibility well in 1 Corinthians 11:1 saying, “Be imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ.” The way we act around others needs to be pure so that we can say this same message to others around us, “imitate me as I imitate Christ.”

Now that we have walked through three areas of purity that help keep us from sinning and draw us nearer to God, it is necessary to note that we do not have to do this alone. 2 Timothy 2:22 says “Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.” As said before, we are to flee from our sin and pursue Godly character, but the key part of this verse is found in the words “with those.” God did not intend for us to fight for purity alone; the task is massive and can be daunting when by ourselves. However, when we surround ourselves with others seeking to accomplish the same goal of having a pure heart, what a burden is taken away from us. This can be found in accountability partners, bible studies, Sunday schools, purposeful group hangouts and more. So, if you have found yourself struggling in purity, whether in the mind, in speech, or in actions, surround yourself with other believers, dive into God’s Word, and fight the good fight!